From the Beginning there was Love
One of the best things about being an author, in this case a blogger, is having artistic or poetic license. That is, the ability to alter text or grammar, to reword something to fit a situation or improve on it to meet your particular purpose. I’ll use some artistic license here to show how central love is to our lives. So here is John 1, but with a little poetic license:
“In the beginning was Love, and Love was with God, and Love was God. Love was in the beginning with God. All things came into being through Love, and apart from Love nothing came into being that has come into being. In Love was life, and the life was the Light of men. The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.”
You know, all of us Catholics were taught that God the Father was this big man sitting on a throne above us with a white beard and nary a smile on his face. The problem is that the Old Testament God was depicted so negatively and that the Church has not done an adequate job – in my opinion – dispelling the notion that the Father is this judgmental ogre; he’s not. A big part of the blame goes to the High Priests who illustrated the image of God in such a manner to serve their own purposes (the same ultra-dogmatic hypocrites that Jesus dealt with in His public life). Also, it was humans interpreting God’s words and actions in the context of their time (thousands of years ago), their ability, or inability, to discern His real meaning, and their understanding of his intentions. Fact is “God’s ways are not our ways, they are as far above us as Heaven”, so we will never truly understand His motives.
In any event, God the Father was, and still is, very misunderstood. One of Christ’s many challenges was to clear up misinterpretations of His Father and present Him differently. If we build our vision of God the Father on His Son’s portrayal, we’ll realize who the Father really is. Remember what Christ said, “He who has seen me, has seen the Father”. The reality is that God the Father is not an old mean man sitting on a marble throne. God is perfected love encompassed in a being, and His Son is perfected love incarnate in human flesh. Here’s the passage that I keep coming back to when I want to understand the Father’s love for us; “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” John 3-16. In giving His only Son, He was giving Him up to suffer a horrendous death so those He created could be with Him, for those He loved; his children – us.
God Is Love and Allows Us to Make Love
From Mark, 10:6; “At the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female. ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
Our Pastor interpreted this Gospel reading one Sunday. He expanded on the statement that “the two becoming one flesh” and that it was a direct reference to intercourse between a husband and wife. He said, at that time when they are one flesh, they are participating with God in the co-creation of life. Why do you think they call it “making love”? What came to my mind? I knew in my heart at that moment what I really believed all my life, but shied away from. That premarital sex is always wrong. Not because I believe a man and woman cannot be in love outside of marriage and understand the incredible strength of sexual attraction. However, the physical union between man and woman is not blessed by God when they are participating in the co-creation of life outside the Sacrament of marriage. The Father did not say “a man will leave his father and mother and be united to a woman“, He said to his wife. The two can only become one flesh in marriage – period.
Another realization about the dangers of premarital and extramarital sex came to me through a very close Evangelical buddy of mine. He was helping me prepare for a presentation I was to give students at St. Leo University in San Antonio, Florida. I was talking to them about my journey through life and wanted the emphasis of my talk to be the toll premarital and extramarital sex has on one’s emotional health. My buddy Ed said to me, “when you make love outside of marriage, not only is the union illicit in the eyes of God, but if that person should exit your life, a part of your soul goes with them, because the two become one flesh. It’s impossible to separate that. Wow! As St. Paul corroborates and clarifies; “Shall I then take away the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? May it never be! Or do you not know that the one who joins himself to a prostitute is one body with her? For He says, “THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH.”
A Heart and Soul Scared and Never to be the Same
That discussion with my friend was a final piece of the puzzle for me in a journey that began long ago. From a young child I was close to Christ and he wrote right and wrong on my heart. I always knew that I should not be intimate with a woman until I was married. Unfortunately, I gave into the sin of lust as a willing, but adolescent decision, treating sex as many many people do; as a recreational activity – as fun. As I think of it now, I’m ashamed. Who was I to participate in the co-creation of life with women outside of marriage – for fun, because it felt good? Because “life” is what he gave me through two married people. What transpired in my life after that first fateful decision has been only confusion and hurt with regard to relationships and intimacy, a just punishment from our Lord who blessed me with knowing the true meaning of love between a man and woman.
When I was in graduate school and after the break-up of a long standing relationship, I began to dedicate myself to the Church and Mass again. I would go to a small university church in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. It was there that I met a young lady who I would eventually fall madly in love with. This time it was different for me, I can’t explain it, but I had never felt like that before, it was so genuine, so intense, so pure that I was washed away by the whole experience. Here I was, 25 years old, living a dream I had always wanted; I had accepted my first professional position with Arthur Andersen, I knew the best years were in front of me, so much promise and now I meet this incredible girl “at Mass”. For me, a story right out of a romance novel. She was the “one”, no doubt in my mind. You know when they say, “I could see my children in her eyes.”? It’s true.
Unfortunately, and in direct disobedience to Christ, we made love – out of wedlock, of course. Little did I know that I had already destroyed any possibility of continuing to live this dream God had given me, because God brought me an amazing gift in this girl and I proceeded to kick Him right in the teeth. Needless to say, it ended and I was hurt in the process. The experience was so devastating that I have never truly recovered, but the encounter was the seminal event of my life; it led to the beginning of my love affair with Christ and His bride – the Catholic Church. Shortly after being left at the altar ( figuratively, not literally) I began to lay in bed each night and speak to Christ out loud, something I had never done before, but I knew he was the only friend I had who understood what I was going through. I was begging him to bring this girl back to me. Then it happened, I can’t explain it. Christ spoke to my mind and said, “Tom, I took my gift away from you because you disrespected that gift by becoming one flesh before I ordained your love.” I wept bitterly at the Truth of it. I was never to be the same again. The happy ending is that the girl and I eventually crossed paths and reconciled, although I never stopped loving her.
Love Defined
Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails………. When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians.
Love – God’s Perfect Gift
From the Beginning there was Love
One of the best things about being an author, in this case a blogger, is having artistic or poetic license. That is, the ability to alter text or grammar, to reword something to fit a situation or improve on it to meet your particular purpose. I’ll use some artistic license here to show how central love is to our lives. So here is John 1, but with a little poetic license:
“In the beginning was Love, and Love was with God, and Love was God. Love was in the beginning with God. All things came into being through Love, and apart from Love nothing came into being that has come into being. In Love was life, and the life was the Light of men. The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.”
You know, all of us Catholics were taught that God the Father was this big man sitting on a throne above us with a white beard and nary a smile on his face. The problem is that the Old Testament God was depicted so negatively and that the Church has not done an adequate job – in my opinion – dispelling the notion that the Father is this judgmental ogre; he’s not. A big part of the blame goes to the High Priests who illustrated the image of God in such a manner to serve their own purposes (the same ultra-dogmatic hypocrites that Jesus dealt with in His public life). Also, it was humans interpreting God’s words and actions in the context of their time (thousands of years ago), their ability, or inability, to discern His real meaning, and their understanding of his intentions. Fact is “God’s ways are not our ways, they are as far above us as Heaven”, so we will never truly understand His motives.
In any event, God the Father was, and still is, very misunderstood. One of Christ’s many challenges was to clear up misinterpretations of His Father and present Him differently. If we build our vision of God the Father on His Son’s portrayal, we’ll realize who the Father really is. Remember what Christ said, “He who has seen me, has seen the Father”. The reality is that God the Father is not an old mean man sitting on a marble throne. God is perfected love encompassed in a being, and His Son is perfected love incarnate in human flesh. Here’s the passage that I keep coming back to when I want to understand the Father’s love for us; “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” John 3-16. In giving His only Son, He was giving Him up to suffer a horrendous death so those He created could be with Him, for those He loved; his children – us.
God Is Love and Allows Us to Make Love
From Mark, 10:6; “At the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female. ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
Our Pastor interpreted this Gospel reading one Sunday. He expanded on the statement that “the two becoming one flesh” and that it was a direct reference to intercourse between a husband and wife. He said, at that time when they are one flesh, they are participating with God in the co-creation of life. Why do you think they call it “making love”? What came to my mind? I knew in my heart at that moment what I really believed all my life, but shied away from. That premarital sex is always wrong. Not because I believe a man and woman cannot be in love outside of marriage and understand the incredible strength of sexual attraction. However, the physical union between man and woman is not blessed by God when they are participating in the co-creation of life outside the Sacrament of marriage. The Father did not say “a man will leave his father and mother and be united to a woman“, He said to his wife. The two can only become one flesh in marriage – period.
Another realization about the dangers of premarital and extramarital sex came to me through a very close Evangelical buddy of mine. He was helping me prepare for a presentation I was to give students at St. Leo University in San Antonio, Florida. I was talking to them about my journey through life and wanted the emphasis of my talk to be the toll premarital and extramarital sex has on one’s emotional health. My buddy Ed said to me, “when you make love outside of marriage, not only is the union illicit in the eyes of God, but if that person should exit your life, a part of your soul goes with them, because the two become one flesh. It’s impossible to separate that. Wow! As St. Paul corroborates and clarifies; “Shall I then take away the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? May it never be! Or do you not know that the one who joins himself to a prostitute is one body with her? For He says, “THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH.”
A Heart and Soul Scared and Never to be the Same
That discussion with my friend was a final piece of the puzzle for me in a journey that began long ago. From a young child I was close to Christ and he wrote right and wrong on my heart. I always knew that I should not be intimate with a woman until I was married. Unfortunately, I gave into the sin of lust as a willing, but adolescent decision, treating sex as many many people do; as a recreational activity – as fun. As I think of it now, I’m ashamed. Who was I to participate in the co-creation of life with women outside of marriage – for fun, because it felt good? Because “life” is what he gave me through two married people. What transpired in my life after that first fateful decision has been only confusion and hurt with regard to relationships and intimacy, a just punishment from our Lord who blessed me with knowing the true meaning of love between a man and woman.
When I was in graduate school and after the break-up of a long standing relationship, I began to dedicate myself to the Church and Mass again. I would go to a small university church in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. It was there that I met a young lady who I would eventually fall madly in love with. This time it was different for me, I can’t explain it, but I had never felt like that before, it was so genuine, so intense, so pure that I was washed away by the whole experience. Here I was, 25 years old, living a dream I had always wanted; I had accepted my first professional position with Arthur Andersen, I knew the best years were in front of me, so much promise and now I meet this incredible girl “at Mass”. For me, a story right out of a romance novel. She was the “one”, no doubt in my mind. You know when they say, “I could see my children in her eyes.”? It’s true.
Unfortunately, and in direct disobedience to Christ, we made love – out of wedlock, of course. Little did I know that I had already destroyed any possibility of continuing to live this dream God had given me, because God brought me an amazing gift in this girl and I proceeded to kick Him right in the teeth. Needless to say, it ended and I was hurt in the process. The experience was so devastating that I have never truly recovered, but the encounter was the seminal event of my life; it led to the beginning of my love affair with Christ and His bride – the Catholic Church. Shortly after being left at the altar ( figuratively, not literally) I began to lay in bed each night and speak to Christ out loud, something I had never done before, but I knew he was the only friend I had who understood what I was going through. I was begging him to bring this girl back to me. Then it happened, I can’t explain it. Christ spoke to my mind and said, “Tom, I took my gift away from you because you disrespected that gift by becoming one flesh before I ordained your love.” I wept bitterly at the Truth of it. I was never to be the same again. The happy ending is that the girl and I eventually crossed paths and reconciled, although I never stopped loving her.
Love Defined
Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails………. When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians.